1. Quads, June 2005

I had just moved from the deadly $2-$6 game to this fresh $4/$8 1/2 Kill game. I was joined by the rest of the G-Vegas crew (Otis, G-Rob, and Bad Blood) and ScurvyDog. The tables was filled out by a few grizzled locals, including an older woman who wouldn't be there too much longer.

The cards are dealt and I look down at the most powerful hand in poker, 72o. I'm UTG and correctly raise. There are, I believe, two or three callers, but none of my fellow bloggers. I was disappointed that no one raised.

The flop comes down 7-7-x. Um... jackpot!!!

I calmly look down at my chips and stack four $1 chips, tossing them into the pot. It actually felt good to not have to bluff with the hand. This time, I get just one caller, the old woman with the impossible-to-believe blonde hair. I begin to pity her, she has no idea what she's up against.

Then it happens.

The dealer peels the next card off the deck and rolls it over. The felt looks like a slot machine, and I'm the one pulling the handle. 7-7-7-x.

Quads. I believe it's just the second time I've ever had quads in a B&M casino. So what do I do? I think you'll all be proud.

I value check my nuts.

To my delight, the "blonde" bets. This is where I wonder if I made a misplay. I simply value call my nuts. I figured I could get more on the river with a smooth call. I think I should have raised.

The river is inconsequential. And I lead out this time. Should I have check-raised here, too? I was really hoping the "blonde" had a legitimate hand and would raise me. How could you possibly put me on a 7? Instead, she simply calls.

Before I even get a chance to show my cards, the "blonde" proudly displays her pocket K's. I would have been proud, too. In fact, if I had been her, I'd have lost a lot more money. How could you not raise me on the river, dammit!?!?

So I calmly flip my HAMMER and lay it down right beside the three 7's on the board. Suddenly, half the table erupts. My fellow bloggers are out of there seats with exclamations of "Hammer!!!!" and "Oh my God!!" I raise my arms in victory.

2. The Legend of the Luckbox, December 2005

The Asian woman is on the button and pushes all in. The solid 30-something guy looks down at his card and also announces all in. He's got her slightly covered. That's when I look down at KQh.

What would you do?

I called, shocking both of my opponents. In fact, I believe I pissed off the Asian woman. She flipped her Big Slick and the other guy flipped pocket J's. Ouch.

I was about 25% before the flop. The J's were in the best shape, favored to win about 42% of the time. But I had them right where I wanted him. Do you know anyone who plays better from behind?

"Well, at least I have outs," I said.

The dealer laid out the flop and it was...

5.
5.
Q.

The rail full of bloggers erupted. I was so shocked, I'm not sure I even saw the Q on the turn. The Ace on the river put an extra knife in the back of the Asian woman. She would have won the hand had I folded. Instead, as the shortest stack, she got the third place she said she'd be happy with.

I won. Someway, somehow, I went for 18th alternate to 1st place and $3650.

3. Waiting for Monsters, January 2006

Shortly after my seat change, a new player sat down to my left. It wasn't long before we all recognized he would be our personal ATM.

My turn to make a withdrawal came after the ATM managed to chip himself back up to about $850. This was after his second rebuy, so he had been spreading his money around nicely.

I'm in LP when I look down at KK. It's raised to $50 in front of me. I just call, as does my ATM. I thought about a reraise here, but figured the ATM might call the $50 from the button, but wouldn't call a reraise. It was a calculated risk inviting another player into the pot.

The flop came down K-Q-7, rainbow. I couldn't ask for much better than that. It's checked to me, I value check my mortal nuts and, predictably, the ATM leads out for $100. The other player in the hand folds. I raise it to $200 and, without hesitating, he calls.

The turn is a 9 and it puts two spades on the board. I think for a moment, and push the rest of my chips into the pot. He's got me slightly covered, but it's about a $600 bet. For a moment, JT flashed through my mind. I worried I just bet into the nuts.

The ATM thought, this time, and I knew my hand was good. He considered and considered, before reluctantly calling. I showed my hand and he dropped his head. He didn't, however, show his hand. He was waiting. That worried me because it meant he had outs.

The river was a T of diamonds. My heart sank. I heard Otis sigh. He thought the same thing I did, "That fucker has a J."

Thanksfully, there was no celebration from the ATM. He flashed K8s and mucked. He had top pair and a flush draw. It was a $1700 pot. It was my biggest pot ever. The adrenaline ran through my veins for the next half hour.

4. The $2200 Laydown, June 2007

I'm writing about this so the nightmares stop.

Why don't we touch the hot stove anymore? Is it because our parents told us not to? Of course not. It's because we touched the hot stove anyway and we got burned. Or, in terms some of you may understand better, why don't we sleep with the drunk, loose skank at the end of the bar? It's because we did it once and we'll never forget that burning feeling either.

Pain is the world's greatest teacher. Without pain, we learn nothing. The pain I felt yesterday will stick with me for a long time.

"Live straddle," the dealer called out.

As the cards went around the table, I was telling the story of the last time I straddled and how badly it went.

"As long as I don't get pocket Kings again, I should be okay," I told them. It was a good table. The people liked to talk, and since I really liked to talk, I fit right in.

"I'll raise." The old man to my left made it $20. It was a strange raise considering my straddle already made it $10. Two other players called before it got back around to me. I looked down at pocket Kings.

The flop came down 963 rainbow. I could hardly complain about that flop. I checked. I tell myself now that it was because I was going to check-raise. There couldn't have been any other reason for a check, right?

The tight old man fired out $100 into an $87 pot. If he was playing on Full Tilt, he'd be an animated rock. He had amassed a stack nearly equal to mine after two people bet into his nut flush. Everyone else at the table knew what he had.

As quickly as the old man bet, the next guy in the pot pushed all in for $285. I hadn't really taken the time to assess why the old man made his bet before the push happened. Now I was processing the second move. All the while, I was thinking about my pocket Kings.

I called.

It didn't take long for the old man to go all in. He had about $950 in front of him. I had him slightly covered. If I was following my own advice, I was calling. But I stopped. I started to think about the laydown. Sometimes making the right laydown is as important as making the right call.

There was now about $1600 in the pot and needed to call another $675. There was a strong possibility that my Kings were good. It was logical to think the original raiser held TT-QQ. The short stack may have had A9 or been on some kind of straight draw. I was getting better than 2-to-1 on my money.

All I saw in my mind were Aces. Hell, I figured the short stack had probably flopped a set. In my mind, I was beat two ways. I was seeing monsters. Something I thought I was over. It was fear. And poker players shouldn't be guided by fear. They should be guided by information.

I folded. I couldn't believe I was doing it as I was doing it. But it was done. The turn and the river were rags. The old man flipped over pocket jacks and the short stack angrily folded.

I was crushed. I touched the stove and it was hot. I'll never do it again.

"Next time take a chance," Lady Luck later told me. "After all, isn't it called gambling? You shouldn't be worried about losing."

At least I know I'm marrying the right girl.

5. Cashing at the Coushatta, January 2006

I'm an idiot. I know that. With 7 players left in the tournament, it's folded to me on the button when I look down at the HAMMER. I hadn't played it all tourney and this was no time to start. Except I raised from T10000 to T30000. The SB folded. The BB had just T37000 and already had T10000 in the pot. I immediately feared my tactical error would cost me. It's not like he could fold. Except he did. And I showed it. The HAMMER. The crowd buzzed and I loved it.

That small stack was out a few hands later.

When we got down to six, there had been three consecutive walks before the BB got to me. I mentioned that I'd appreciate that trend to continue. "But if it doesn't, I defend my Big Blind with a suckout," I told the table.

It's folded all the way around to the SB and as soon as he put his chip on his cards, I knew he was betting. He always stopped as though he was thinking about betting, but when he folded, he never put his chip on his cards.

He raised me up 4xBB. I looked down a KJo. It was decision time. If I fold here, I'm in 5th or 6th in chips. I almost never call with this hand, and didn't even consider it here. That meant fold or raise, and raising meant pushing.

That's exactly what I did, putting my tournament at stake. I'm not sure what I put him on or what chance I gave myself, but I thought there was a slight chance I was ahead, and, at worst, I figured I was in for a race.

"He raised with 7-2 offsuit earlier," I heard a woman say from the rail. I smiled on the inside, while yelling "FOLD!" to my opponent.

He was in the tank and I considered calling for the clock. "Do you have a bigger pocket pair than me?" he asked. My heart sank. I knew there was no way he was laying down a pair. He called and flipped 6's.

It was time for the Luckbox to make an appearance. However, I was 46% to win the hand pre-flop, and, frankly, that's not nearly far enough behind. So when the flop missed me (8-5-2), I felt much better about my chances. Suddently I'm just 24% and, predictably, I found my J on the turn. The river was a blank and I was in great shape. In fact, I had jumped to 2nd in chips.

Luckbox's 5 Favorite Poker Blogs
Bad Blood on Poker
Dead Money = Sir AlCantHang
Guinness and Poker
Tao of Poker
Wicked Chops Poker

Luckbox's 5 Favorite Poker-related Sites
Poker Odds Calculator
Two Plus Two Poker Forum
Poker News
PokerStars
Full Tilt Poker

Luckbox's 5 Favorite Poker Hands
The HAMMER (72 offsuit)
The JackHammer (J4)
Snowman, Tater Legs (83)
Hiltons (QQ)
The Tourist (A7)

Luckbox's 5 Most Famous Live Opponents
Gavin Smith
Brandon Schaefer
Wil Wheaton
Max Pescatori
G-Rob

Luckbox's 5 Opponents He Most Enjoys Sucking Out On
Waffles
Hoy
G-Rob
SoxLover
Fuel55

Luckbox's 5 Most Enjoyable G-Vegas Playing Partners
Otis
G-Rob
Bad Blood
The Mark
TeamScottSmith

Luckbox's 5 Most Enjoyable Non-G-Vegas Playing Partners
BG
Maudie
Joe Speaker
Bobby Bracelet
Change100

Beginning in 2009, all players on the LPGA tour will be required to speak English. Apparently, the geniuses running women's golf think the reason no one watches their sport is because of those damn foreigners.

The solution? A lot more broken English. Imagine if you were told that in the next 6 months you needed to know how to speak Korean. I doubt you'd fare very well.

Starting in January, every player will have to pass an oral exam. I'd be real curious to see how that test is administered. What exactly is the threshhold for proficiency? Seriously, this has to be one of the stupidest things I've ever read.

This regulation likely won't be as successful as the LPGA's last initiative designed to boost ratings. A few years ago, players were told to sex it up. They were encouraged to wear sexier outfits and to, well... be hotter. That managed to boost ratings by a factor of absolutely nothing.

Nonetheless, there's a reason you likely know the name Natalie Gulbis (pictured and ranked 34th in the world) more than Yani Tseng (ranked third in the world, and I dare you to click through for her picture).

I guess it's a good think Natalie knows English. No word on how fluent Yani Tseng is!

This isn't the first time I've ever been to a D&B's, but it is the first time I noticed just how pervasive the Vegas-like games are. Wheel of Fortune? Check. Horse Racing? Check. The Big Wheel? Check.

Leaving there, I wondered whether or not the operations were owned, at least in part, by a company with gambling interests. My limited Google research came up empty in that regard. D&B's is currently owned primarily by the private equity firm Wellspring Capital Management. That doesn't mean there isn't some gambling in its past, however.

David Corriveau and James "Buster" Corley are the men behind the franchise, and one of Corriveau's early jobs was as a blackjack dealer in Vegas. The very first D&B's in Dallas 26 years ago included cashless blackjack. In 1994, a Texas judge ruled that the restaurant could, in fact, give away prizes worth more than $5 in exchange for tickets won while playing games.

As we all know, it's not a far cry from winning tickets to winning money. And although the company says its target audience is adults from 24-44... I'm fairly certian the number of kids out-numbered the number of adults while I was there. Of course, places like Chucky Cheese have been perfecting the kiddie gambling racket for years, but this is different. When the games look virtually the same, the intent seems rather clear.

So am I arguing this is a bad thing? Not a chance... Start 'em early. That's what I say. The sooner they learn how to lose their money, the sooner they start losing it to me!

Michael Phelps

He's far and away the biggest name in the Olympics right now. He's already won 5 gold medals in the pool this year and a record 11 in his career. His goal is to win eight in 2008, setting a new standard there as well. Oh... and he's got a slew of world records next to his name as well. He's money in the bank and no one else is even close.

Verdict?
Not a chance. Someone who wins that consistently and in that dominant a fashion can find himself another table.

Alicia Sacramone

She's the U.S. gymnastics team captain although she's, at best, third best on the team. And when the team needed her the most, she fell... twice. I suggested that perhaps she was better suited for Canadian citizenship.

Verdict?
Anyone who reacts that way to pressure is welcome to sit at my table any time!

Kobe Bryant

Some say he's the best basketball player in the world. I'm not one of them (put me in the LeBron camp). Still, being the second best player in the world isn't all bad. Thankfully, this team is a little closer to the Dream Team than they are to the disappointing teams of the last few Olympics.

Verdict?
The guy's been pretty clutch in his career, but I know how to throw him off his game. I'll just bring up Shaq and the rape charges in Colorado. Oh... and he's rolling in the dough so he probably won't care about the stakes we're playing.

Stephanie Rice

She's Australia's swimming queen and a big hit in the Aussie tabloids. She also has three gold medals and three world records so far in '08. She's a winner in the mold of Michael Phelps, but looks much better in a swimsuit.

Verdict?
Phelps got tossed because he never loses. I'm not willing to do the same with Rice. Have you seen her? She's in.

Hamid Soryan Reihanpour

He's the defending world champion in Greco-Roman Wrestling at the 121 lbs. weight class. And he's Iranian.

Verdict?
One crack about them "terrorists" and he'll crush me with his bare hands. No thanks. I don't care how bad of a player he might be.

Kerri Walsh and Misty May-Treanor

This beach volleyball team hasn't lost a match in something like ten years (101 matches in 18 tournaments). And you thought Michael Phelps and the women's softball team were good? And being a bit of a dabbler in volleyball myself, I'm a big fan of this duo.

Verdict?
Sorry, they're out. I know Drizz will be disappointed, but it's not like they'd be wearing their bikinis! They'd just make me feel bad about not being as good in volleyball, and they'd likely take my money.

Chris Estrada

This guy is from my old haunting ground down in Leezy-anna. He's also America's first Olympic representative in that ancient sport of Trampoline. That's right... as the Olympics get ready to dump sports like baseball and softball, they're showcasing that world-wide craze of trampoline. Just more reason to look down on the rest of the world.

Verdict?
He's in. Look... he jumps on a trampoline as an Olympic sport. I just can't be intimidated by a guy who's sport is performed by spoiled 7-year olds in suburban back yards. I'm also about a foot taller than him, so I've got that going for me. And according to his Olympic profile, "In 2001, Estrada walked away from the sport. He had a mental block that prevented him from twisting on forward flipping skills." Mental blocks? Oh yeah,
you're in!

We weren't too deep into the tournament and I was still sitting right around my average stack. I'd given a few chips away before check-raising with the Hiltons on an undercard board getting myself back to even.

I'm dealt JhTd in middle position. There's one caller in front of me and I limp as well. It's folded around to the small blind who completes. The big blind then raises to 3xBB. The first limper folds. I call and the small blind folds.

That means two of us see a flop of 8s9s8h. I'm open ended. My opponent, with whom I am unfamiliar, leads out for about 2/3 of the pot. It's an easy call for me, I think. It's as likely to be a continuation bet as it is to be an overpair or underpair.

The turn is the seven of spades. I love the fact that I've hit my straight, but I hate the fact that it's a spade. Nonetheless, I'm pretty committed to this pot at this point. I can't sit around fearing the flush. My opponent leads out again and I push. He instantly called.

Any guesses on what he held?

He flipped over pocket tens, including the ten of spades. I would imagine that he thought he was in great shape. He had both an overpair and an open ended straight flush draw. That's strong. I was 68% to win the hand and 4% to tie it. There was a 2-1 chance that I double up and almost a 3-1 chance that I'm still in the tourney.

I knew I was done. Before the card even came. That evil poker doubt crept into my mind. The four of spades did it. The table said, "Ouch."

Was it "ouch," really? It's not like it was a stupid call. It's not like I tricked the guy into betting into my monster. Who among us wouldn't have made the call he did?

The cards fell his way that time. I'm sure he truly believed it'd go his way. Next time, I'll believe in the power of the Luckbox. It got me this far...

Euchre

It's the first card game I played with the G-Vegas crew. As you can see from G-Rob's post about frolf, the G-Vegas crew has rolled through a few obsessions over the years. For awhile, we couldn't get enough Euchre. In fact, we began referring to it only as M.E.N. (Marathon Euchre Night). It doesn't get much more gay than that... but, I digress...

Here is where I toot my own horn. I was (and probably still am) a killer Euchre player. It's a great game and I love the strategy involved. But it lacked something... the gamble. We never did put any real money on our games (not that pride wasn't enough of a prize). And that's a shame, because I would have cleaned up.

Cribbage

Cribbage is a game that's been in my family for years. My grandfather played it back during his Navy days. It's one of the first card games I learned to play despite the complicated nature of the rules.

Back when my sister got engaged, my Dad challenged my soon-to-be-brother-in-law to a game of cribbage. If he won, he got to marry my sister. He won. I think my Dad had a few beers that night because my brother-in-law isn't very good at the game. I was. Here's that horn tooting again.

There were family vacations where we would set up a cribbage tournament. I wasn't always the best in the family, but in this game, sometimes the cards just don't fall your way. I suppose that's true of every card game... so it's a lesson I learned very young.

Canasta

If there's one game I remember playing before Cribbage, it was Canasta. Apparently, it was really popular on my Dad's side of the family. This one could be played with as many as 6 players which made it a lot of fun.

I'm not sure how good I really was. In my mind, I was awesome... but I stopped playing that game regularly in my early teens. I don't think looking back 15 or 20 years is easy. I wouldn't mind playing again soon.

Oh S$%!

In Wikipedia, this one is known as Oh Hell. Apparently my family enjoyed the more obscene varient. This is a game my family still plays every time we get together. It's a perfect game for a group that enjoys screwing each other over as often as possible. Maybe I should get a blogger league together...

I'm going to tell you that it's hard to be good at this game... but that's probably only because I'm not very good at it. I lose at this on a regular basis, and I lose badly. But it's a game we play so much that my Dad has invented new rules, adding jokers to the deck.

In a few weeks, I'll be seeing my family for my niece's first birthday. I'm sure we'll get a few hands in.

So what about poker? Poker is the newest card game on the list. It's one I first started learning from my father. Then I stumbled into a dealer's choice game with a few degenerates in G-Vegas. And then, this all happened. I wonder how much I'd still be playing if I was still back in South Cackalacky. Playing online is fine... but, as you can gather from the descriptions above, it's still the social part of the games that appeals to me the most.

If you're not familiar with it, it's VHI's answer to MTV's Real World/Road Rules Challenges (and if you're not familiar with that, think Battle of the Network Stars but substitute people in minute 14 of their 15 minutes of fame). This show gathers together some of the more stupid and desperate contestants from previous reality shows Rock of Love, Flavor of Love and I Love New York. Remember, these are people who spent weeks demeaning themselves while fighting for the affection of Bret Michaels, Flava Flav and some crazy woman whom Flava Flav nicknamed New York.

Now they gather to battle it out for something a little more tangible: Cash.

One contestant is apparently attempting to get herself into the reality show Hall of Fame. Megan (pictured right) is now on her third reality show. She's already split $250,000 for winning Beauty and the Geek. She was then dumped by Bret Michaels. And now she's back for more. She may or may not have been a Playboy Cyber Girl of the Month, I don't know, I haven't Googled her.

Anyway, she's the kind of person in this world who is clearly getting by on the only talent she has. If you don't know what it is, you haven't looked at the picture. Should I begrudge her that? She clearly enjoys the attention and yearns to be on TV as much as possible. If we've only got 15 minutes, I guess we better get all we can before time runs out!

What the hell does this have to do with poker?!?

Good question. But if you can't guess the answer, then you haven't been paying attention to the poker world over the past 5 years.

Exposure is everything. Had Hevad Khan acted like Eric Seidle, would you still remember his name? If Mike "The Mouth" Matusow was as animated as "Action" Dan Harrington, would he get a featured table every year at the WSOP?

Hole card cameras, the WPT and and ESPN changed everything. It's not just enough anymore to be good at poker. You have to be good at poker AND have a schtick. For many, you have to be willing to make a complete fool of yourself.

I'm not suggesting the characters didn't exist before the TV cameras turned on. Scotty Nguyen has always been Scotty Nguyen. But there is a new breed of TV hogs out there. They know if they're loud and obnoxious, they get their own 5 minutes on ESPN. And if they get 5 minutes on ESPN, some online poker room out there will hand him some cold hard cash to wear a patch.

We all love money.

The Arrival

Lucky in life, unlucky in flights.

I think that's probably the slogan I live by. My problems on planes have been long discussed. This time, my flight to connect in Charlotte was diverted to Greensboro because we were running out of fuel as we waited for a storm to clear. After an hour on the ground, we were finally headed back to Charlotte and eventually to Vegas. I lost at least a couple of hours of gambling time... maybe that's a good thing.

I stepped off the plane a tired man. It only took one breath of the energy-infused Vegas air to change that. Or maybe it was the sound of the Wheel of Fortune slot machine which triggered my brain to boost my adrenaline.

Coming down the escalator, I saw three massive billboards side-by-side: Bette Middler, Elton John and Cher. I was 12% more gay by the time I got to the bottom. I stopped and stared at the sign for Bite just to return to normal.

The Visit

It's a blur, but isn't every visit it to Vegas? I was there for about 66 hours. I spent about 20 hours sleeping. But those are just numbers. Numbers like this:

The house edge on the first game I played in Vegas, Texas Hold 'Em Bonus: 2.037%

That's not so bad, especially since the bets go up during each hand which brings down the element of risk to just 0.5335%. Of course, we're degenerates. We needed action. That meant shelling out even more for the BONUS bet. The house edge on that bet is 8.5405%. That's a bad bet.

I lost money. Bad Blood cashed out ahead by more than $3000.

Or this:

Odds my flopped two pair with K5 would double up against the jackass who called me with top pair: 83%

The 5 on the turn sealed it and the table ATM pushed nearly $700 my way. Before the end of the night, he would double up Bad Blood and he would get in a three-way all-in with Otis with the sickest river card I saw all trip. I'll let him tell you that story. In just 2 1/2 hours, the three of us took almost five grand off that table. Blind monkeys were crushing that game. G-Rob dropped $1500.

Or this:

Number of times my set lost to a lower pair that became quads: 2

Telling bad beat stories is no fun. And no one wants to hear them anyway. Thankfully, the first time it happened it was a $4/$8 limit game and the second time was the $340 nightly tournament at the Rio while I was already short-stacked. Losing to quads in a NL game would be much more costly.

The Departure

All trips to Vegas come to an end, and most of them at least a day after they should. Sin City has a way of getting your heart pumping at the beginning just so it can suck the life out of you by the end. These casinos don't just take your money, they trade on your soul. You rarely feel the same at the end as you did at the beginning.

And yet I can't wait to get back. I love it there... even when I'm hating it.

In 10 days, I'll be back in Vegas for the first time since the 2006 WSOP. And of those few dozen poker bloggers whom I first met that December weekend, I'll again get to spend time at the tables with Iggy, Pauly, Bad Blood, FTrain, Poker Prof and maybe even AlCantHang. Add in Otis and GRob, and we'll have nearly a third of that first group of bloggers back in Vegas together.

It was a long strange road that got us all there in the first place. A quick check of the archives shows these poker blogs started popping up in late 2003.

Pauly launched in August 2003:

Texas Hold'em poker is probably the most difficult, yet the most exhilirating card game out there. I know there are fanatics who share my same disposition and now there's a site for them to visit. Combined with the knowlegde that there are not too many poker blogs out there... I decided to start my own. 100% Poker speak... 100% of the time!

We opened here in September 2003:

Welcome to Up For Poker! Hopefully soon, there will be more contributors than just myself. This will also help my Up For Anything readers avoid a majority of my gambling rambling.

Iggy popped up a few weeks later:

Well, well, well. Figured I might as well start trying to document some of my experiences with God's nectar, Guinness, and the online Phenomena of Poker. I've been playing poker online for about six years. Drinking seriously for about twenty.

HDouble came next in October 2003 (where have ye gone?):

That's it for my introduction. Hopefully this journal will help me improve my game, as well as give me a chance to develop some thoughts worth developing. And if it gives some readers a few laughs or nods of recognition along the way, that would be nice too...

Update: BG also chimed in with his first poker post in October 2003:

I've been playing Texas Hold 'Em (no limit, $10 buy-in, winner take all) with the same group for about three months now. Normally, we're getting together six to ten strong on a weekend night, and playing until 1 or 2 AM. So far, so good. There's only two of us that can claim three victories during these games. I'm one of them.

Maudie jumped into the game in November 2003:

I hadn't played much hold-em previously - let alone no-limit - and so I was at sea with the jargon and had no clue as to strategy. Being the curious cat I am, I googled for poker reading material and was lead to my first poker publication purchase (nice alliteration, wouldn't you say?) Super System by Doyle Brunson.

Hammer-inventor Grubby joined a few days later:

I love playing poker.
I love eating.

Hey, why not combine the two?

Mean Gene emerged in December 2003:

I'm going to write more stuff than just hand histories here, honest. I'm thinking maybe some poker fiction. I mean, you just KNOW that a flood of poker movies and books are flooding to market right now. Maybe I should jump on the bandwagon.

AlCantHang finally took the plunge in February 2004:

I've been hitting alot of poker blogs recently and they've been well written and very enjoyable. Probably not so for this one. Those who know me will tell you, I drink too much and play poker poorly. I mean really bad.

BadBlood hopped on the train in March 2004:

Ah yes, a community that I could understand. Poker.

Well, at this point in time, I'd played for a few years off-line. And about 9 months on-line, many that I'd like to forget...

And finally, PokerProf and Flipchipro in April 2004:

I decided to undertake this blog effort after considerable encouragement and harassment from various family and staff members. I will make every effort to be timely with my entries, offer content that is interesting and related to the Las Vegas poker scene and supplement the journal entries with photos.

**********************

I'm sure there are some I forgot or lost (can anyone figure out BG's wacky archiving?), but these are the ones who I remember built the foundation. The number of new poker blogs really started to take off in the middle of 2004. By the end of the year, a few dozen of us had this crazy idea that we could get our own private tournament run in a live Vegas poker room, that we could get top pros to play, that we could get online poker rooms to give us free stuff, and that we could get other top pros to meet and talk with us before the tourney.

To this day, I'm not sure how much Guinness and SoCo it took for us to think any of this was possible. And yet, there we were. In the middle of an experience we would likely never experience again. From the insane limo ride to Sam's Town to doubling up on Max Pescatori to the depravity that Vegas drops on us, I'll never forget the first time I met the poker blogger community.

And now I can't wait to get back to Vegas.

"Hey, baby. The G-Vegas guys are going to Vegas at the end of the month," I told her.

"That sounds like fun... you should go, too," she responded.

And that was that. The good news is that Lady Luck really, really likes the G-Vegas guys since there were such great guests at our wedding. She also knows that despite their proclivity to drunken insanity, that I have a unique ability to weather their storms.

The final details are as such:

I fly out Thursday June 26th, landing in Vegas shortly before midnight.
I fly back Sunday June 29th, leaving Vegas just after 6pm.

That's two and a half days of poker and stupid table games. I may actually even partake of a cold beverage or two. Lady Luck even told me she doesn't care if I hit a strip club, although that's not in the plans.

I'm really looking forward to seeing the hard-working WSOP bloggers (and Michalski). I frankly can't remember the last time I saw Pauly and Change100. I've even heard it's a certain blogger's birthday and I can't imagine why he wouldn't want to celebrate it in Vegas!

My only disappointment is that I won't get a chance to be part of the big blogger gathering kicking off this weekend. Instead, I'll be at the ultimate tourist destination (Mobile, AL) for a news director's conference. Bet you all wish you were there!

And for the rest of you who will be in Sin City at the end of this month...

See you in Vegas!!!!

It's a good thing online poker wasn't really around when I was in college. I first discovered it a couple years after graduating. I was living in G-Vegas and making a few bucks a month at a dealer's choice home game.

I found my rush at Ultimate Bet. I actually managed to build a bankroll by cashing in a freeroll and getting a few bucks from a royal flush. I turned it into a couple hundred dollars and thought I was the greatest player in the history of poker. In reality, I was a donkey (before they were called donkeys). But my itch was being scratched.

I truly believe the poker blogger community helped me get over my need for that rush. Frankly, chasing was the best way to embarrass myself in front of my new invisible friends. I wanted to show them I knew how to play. I started to think less about the gamble and more about how to be a winning player.

I've lost that.

I've played so infrequently over the past year that when I do play, I can last about three levels before I'm ready to push all-in on a button steal with KTo. I'm more than happy to race with pocket 3s despite an M of 12. When I lose, that's okay... the adrenaline lasts long enough for me to close down the program.

I'm a bad poker player again (some would argue I was never good, but I digress...). I doubt any bloggers worry when they find me at their table. It's not like I give them any reason to.

So where's the rush? I'm increasingly finding it at the track. Judging by the lack of comments on my horse racing posts, I'm guessing there's little interest in my handicapping. That's probably a good thing because I don't think I'm a real good handicapper, either. I've gotten just lucky enough over the years to fool myself.

But I love it. Whereas in the past, I might spend an entire Saturday playing tourney after tourney... now I'd rather handicap a card and watch the races at Belmont.

That's not a good thing. When I'm playing right, I know I have an edge at the poker table. At the track? The house has the edge. If I'm chasing the rush there, I know I'm going to be a loser in the long run.

So what's the answer? I wish I knew. We have a Wii now. I think I'll lay a few bets with Lady Luck on Super Mario Kart.

To be honest with you, I can't remember the last time I played in a blogger event. From what I've read, my get-in-behind-and-suck-out technique seems to be the preferred method for winning these events. All the really talented players are being felted by players who have copied my patented strategies.

Now it's my turn. Buoyed by my luckboxing in the Pick 4, I think now is the perfect time to return to the virtual tables.

My only advice to you? Get in behind. I just can't hold a lead. I am the Mitch Williams of the poker world.

(Am I dating myself? Is the 1993 World Series too long ago? That's the BASEBALL world series, by the way, not the WSOP. Would it have been better to call myself the Eric Gagne of the poker world? Does anyone watch baseball anymore? Should I be the Memphis-Tigers-in-a-championship-game of the poker world?)

The MATH Live-blog

9:00- My starting table: bayne_s, swimmom95, NumbBono, Julius_Goat, Breeze81, UpForPoker

9:01- bayne_s flops a set of 4s on the first hand, but gets nothing out of it, tough break.

9:04- I fold KQo out of the small blind to an UTG raise from bayne_s. A weak play six-handed, but it's early. I hate being out of position with such an easily dominated hand.

9:05- My first raise, with KJo from UTG+1. No callers.

9:07- Pocket 6s in the BB, and I call an UTG raise by Breeze81. The flop misses me (J97) and I check. Breeze81 does not follow up with a c-bet. So, either the flop hit him hard and he's slow playing, or he doesn't c-bet. Guess I'll see. I fold to a bet on the turn.

9:08- Pocket Ts this time. I again call a raise. This time, the flop brings just one overcard (J94). swimmom95 leads out and I raise, she calls. The turn is a blank, she checks, I bet about 2/3rds of the pot, she folds. I'm at T3300.

9:14- Pocket 7s. For the third time, I called a preflop raise with a pocket pair. The flop was K93. Julius_Goat c-bet half the pot, which screamed, "Weak!!!" I put out a strong raise and he folded. T3630.

9:16- HAMMER. I raise 3x from the button, as per the poker blogger rule book, and get called from the SB and BB. The flop is T42, checked to me, I bet about 2/3rds and the fold. Show. HAMMER.

9:17- Rockets. Julius_Goat raises in front of me. I just call. Not my normal play, but I give it a shot. Flop comes down K-high, no straight, no flush, great flop for AA. He checks, I bet about half the pot, he check-raises me. I don't buy it... and I think about just calling. But if he has AK or KQ, I probably felt him, so I re-re-raise. He folds, "not really my night," he types. T4660.

9:23- And swimmom95 is down almost to the felt (T75). AT vs. AK on an AKJ flop. AK holds up for Julius_Goat.

9:25- My chance to knock out swimmom95. I have JJ, she has 62o. Naturally, she wins the hand, flopping two pair. Told you I play better from behind.

9:27- I double up swimmom95 again when my 89s takes the lead on her A5s on the turn, but she rivers a flush. I have to make sure I take the lead at the river, not before. T4010.

9:30- Pocket 4s. I call a raise, three of us see a flop of K77. Not the worst flop ever. It's checked around. 9 on the turn, I lead out and get called by both. River is another K. I'm counterfeited and it's checked around again. bayne_s had pocket Qs, Julius_Goat had JT. Down to T3810.

9:39- swimmom95 doubles up again. KJ outflops AT. From the dead to T1260.

9:42- Pocket 7s. I call and the BB raises to 280. I take a shot at hitting the flop, figuring I'll get paid off if I do. Flop is T84, two spades. NumbBono insta-pushes for about half my remaining stack. Looking back to a minute or so ago, I think I should have called. I believe NumbBono was pushing no matter what hit the flop. There's a good chance I was ahead. But I'm still above starting stack, just below average stack. I'd rather get my chips in when I'm more sure. I'll keep my eye out for that move again.

9:48- And we lose bayne_s. Poor guy. Okay, he just got moved to another table.

9:51- Table has gotten really tight. No flops. I'll have to take advantage of that.

9:52- mclarich joins the table. Never heard of him.

9:54- Now I don't like him either. I raise on the button with A8o and he calls from the BB. Flop misses me, T94. He checks, I c-bet, he check-raises. I pretty much knew it was going to happen, so I should have saved my money. Who knows, maybe I would have hit the A on the turn. I'll file this away and use it to my advantage next time.

9:55- swimmom95 sucks out a chop with AJ vs. AQ preflop. She is Rasputin.

9:59- swimmom95 finally makes the mistake of getting in ahead. AQ vs. J8s. J8 rivers the straight. And we lose our first player. I'm down to T2080, by the way. I don't like mclarich. I will double through him.

10:00- First break. I'm not sure how much I liked my play. I stole some pots, won a solid one with AA and got myself up to T4660. It all started going downhill when I got in ahead against swimmom95. I don't have to remind you how bad I am at that. I'll likely need to be more aggressive in the next hour. I will double through mclarich.

10:05- Loretta8 joins our table. Still unfamiliar. I've been away for awhile.

10:08- My M is 10. Do bloggers still talk about Ms?

10:11- KTs. I raise preflop and get two callers. The flop is about as good as it gets, considering I missed it. 743, two diamonds. I've got a flush draw and over cards. As long as I'm not up against Aces or a small pair that hit a set, I like my chances. I push. And get called. By Aces. So much for that. The river King must have been Full Tilt's idea of a joke. I didn't get to double through mclarich after all. Guess that will have to wait until the next blogger tourney.

Change isn't easy. I haven't had much time to think about what it's going to be like to be married because I've been focused on planning this whole crazy wedding. Then, smack dab in the middle of this, I've had to find a new job. Let's just say my Luckbox skills have once again extended to the real world.

In addition to finding the perfect woman in Lady Luck, I've now had a perfect job opportunity fall in my lap. With a contract that's soon to expire, I decided staying in Lafayette wasn't right for me.

From Lincoln to G-Vegas to Knoxville to Lafayette... and now Evansville, IN. Once again, it's not a city I ever imagined I'd live in, but in my business, the job often picks you. A 30% increase over what I'm making now sure did help make it an easy decision. Throw in the remarkably good buyers housing market, and I was sold.

Oh, did I mention the casinos? Let's just say I'm thinking E-Vegas might be a good moniker.

Next week, the G-Vegas crew comes to Leezy-anna for a little gambling, a little Bourbon St. and a whole lot of alcohol. Then it's that little wedding thing that I'm honored they've all decided to be a part of. Then Lady Luck and I start packing for our new life a little further north.

To say it's a whirlwind is an understatment. But when I'm settled, I can promise you'll see a lot more of me on here and at the virtual tables. You get to decided if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

By the time I got there, 10 names were already on the list. Since it was my first time, I didn't know how long I'd have to wait. At about 7pm, they slid a poker table out from a back room and set it up. Player's names were called and chips were sold.

I stood by the bar, nervously sipping a Bud Light. It was a half hour later when they slid another table out from the back. This time I got a seat. It was a $1/$2 NL game with no max buy in. Everyone else was buying in for around $200. I bought in for $500. I spent the next three hours robbing college kids of daddy's money while wondering if I would be robbed or arrested before the night was over.

I left with my $700 profit and, despite deciding it was one of the softest games I'd ever seen, I vowed to never return.

Mere weeks later, the local police department began breaking up bar room games. The poker boom was going bust. Or so some would say...

That's the only time I've ever had to nervously watch the door during a poker session in Louisiana. The reason is simple. I have a half dozen legal poker rooms with games and tournaments I love to play within an hour or so drive.

There's the Coushatta Casino (my personal favorite), the Paragon Casino, Cypress Bayou Casino, Harrah's New Orleans, Isle of Capri Casino and Boomtown Casino and that doesn't even include the two poker rooms in Shreveport or the next poker room currently in discussion for Baton Rouge.

With the homegrown Louisiana players and additional flood of players from the Houston area seeking legal poker, the game is thriving in Louisiana. I can get a $2/$5 NL game at any time of day or night. On some days, they're even spreading the $5/$10 NLHE/PLO8. And you never have to worry about a gun to your head or a SWAT team invasion. I'd much rather save my fear for what monster my opponent may be holding.

**********************

On a completely unrelated note, for those who got this far, I wanted to let everyone know that I'm a long shot for Vegas. A long shot at best. As most of you know, I'm engaged, and the wedding is now just a few months away (Januray to be exact). So barring some kind of miracle (or a hell of a wedding gift!), the trip just isn't practical right now. Either way, I'm sure everyone who goes will have a blast, I'm just sorry I'll miss it.

Over the past few weeks, I've been teaching her the game of poker. We started slow, just learning the rank of hands. From there, I showed her how the game of Texas Hold 'Em is played. Next, we considered starting hands. Then it was learning when to throw a hand away. Finally, we started slinging chips.

In our first mock game, it became immediately clear that being dominated does not bother Lady Luck. Late in the game, I'm holding J8 to her 89. Her short stack is destined to become mine.

I burn a card and slowly reveal the flop. It's a 7 in the door.

"Oooh," I say, "that's good news, you might have a straight draw."

The next card I reveal is a 10. Uh oh, I think. And there it is. A six. She flopped the nut straight. We had just watched Rounders. I felt a little like Teddy KGB (insert your own jokes here).

The turn and river did me no good, she had doubled up.

The next time she got herself all in, she was holding 78s. I don't want you to think she's just playing connectors. She was the shortest stack and was finding the best spots she could to get her money in. I was holding 57s. Our big stack, the ghost player (there were two other hands I was managing), was holding KQs.

The flop? How about 8-7-x. The turn? How about the case 7. Her boat was unbeatable, but, unfortunately for me, the ghost hand managed a four flush on the river and knocked me out.

I really think she enjoyed it. Checking is still a bit of a tricky concept for her, but the rest of the stuff has come pretty quickly. She's even learning shuffle chips.

We'll be home this weekend visiting family and maybe we'll have a chance to see how she stands up against the rest of the Luckbox clan. It's only a matter of time before she's taking your money at the tables.

She's got the gene.

Cartoon

He's the big stack. At just over four months old, he's picked up the game rather quickly. He plays a lot like your online newcomers. He can't fold to save his life and wouldn't recognize a squeeze play if it was spelled out in dog treats.

But the cards have been right. And, really, sometimes that's all it takes. I flop a set and he rivers a straight. I turn the straight and he rivers the flush. I river the flush but his two pair becomes a boat. I just can't beat him.

Not to mention he's about as easy to read as a wikipedia entry on quantum mechanics. Really, those puppy eyes don't change much... and if he's wagging his tail it might only be because he smells bacon.

Swirl

She's got a few more year's experience at the poker table and she's putting it to good use. Her blunt style reminds me of G-Rob. I can't tell you the number of times I've laid down a good hand to her only to see her table the Hammer. She's a killer, really... it must be the Pit Bull blood in her.

The good news is that she's got a few tells. For instance, when she begins panting, it's time for her to go outside. That doesn't really help me win any more chips, but it sure beats the surprises we get from Cartoon.

Over time, I'm pretty sure I can beat her game. She's got some skills, but I've felted G-Rob enough times to know I can break down this style. Now I just need some cards to help do it!

Lady Luck

Here's the problem. She doesn't really know how to play at this point. I suppose on occasion she'd actually lay down that gutshot straight draw if she knew how unlikely it was to hit. Then when it hits, I'm the one who gets to explain that she's beaten my two pair.

She also thinks it's fun to root for the dogs against me. Every time Cartoon wins a pot, she cheers and gives him a treat. You can imagine how quickly that can put someone on tilt.

Finally, we're still a few months away from the wedding, and it's in my best interest to stay away from my fiancee's bad side. After all, there are plenty of consequences... if you know what I mean.

She did, however, let me put together what's been dubbed "The Man Room," complete with my poker table, so I've got that going for me!

The Luckbox

That leaves me, your hero... and the short stack at this table.

Things have to get better, right? I am the only one in this game to read Harrington on Hold 'Em. That's got to be good for something, right?

In reality, I just haven't had as much time to play poker these days. This whole getting married thing takes up a lot of time. Of course, I wouldn't trade it for those bachelor days, not for anything.

Last weekend, I took a shot at a couple of tourneys and ran into Aces every single time. I'm also still smarting from laying down those Kings at the Coushatta months ago. It's still stuck in my mind and I have to get rid of it.

After all... I've got a wedding to pay for!

***************

And in case you were wondering... here's the board from the hand we were playing above:

Yeah... wrong time to play The Hammer.

******************

Sitting in the Keno lounge, I was sorry I didn't yet know how to play Craps. It seems my grandfather was quite the dice thrower. My family was in upstate NY visiting me at college. Perphas the lure of the Turning Stone Casino helped convince my grandfather to come.

I hadn't yet perfected my Lite Brite method of Keno wagering. It, of course, is no better than any other method that's sure to be a loser. It didn't matter, however, because I just thought it was cool to be gambling with my grandfather.

He played the $5 20-spot ticket and as the numbers came up, he missed and missed and missed. He missed every one of them. And it paid off a couple hundred dollars. I thought he was the greatest gambler of all time. Who actually wins at Keno?

We spent the next couple hours in the Bingo hall playing off his winnings. It's the only chance I ever got to gamble with him. He died a few years ago. It was a bit of a surprise.

Yesterday was not a surprise. My grandmother had been sick for years. In fact, it's probably been five years since I had a coherent conversation with her. Her mind went first and, unfortunately, her body took years to break down. It was a long time coming, but she's in a better place now. And that's not just a cliche to me.

******************

I'm not sure how much my grandparents on my father's side gambled. I know they loved to play cards. I've been playing canasta and cribbage and gin and just about any card game you can imagine since I was old enough to understand them.

It was my Dad who first introduced me to poker. He also first introduced me to horses. And craps for that matter. There's no question that I wouldn't be the gambler today if it weren't for Dad.

Of course, I don't want to let Mom off the hook either. She once came to visit me when I lived in Lincoln, NE and we took a trip across the river to Council Bluffs and the riverboat casinos. She spent most of her time at the Wheel of Fortune slot machine and hit a nice jackpot for a couple hundred bucks.

Perhaps my luck is genetic?

Even if my grandmother wasn't a gambler, I'm sure she considered herself lucky back on that Thanksgiving afternoon. She had a big family that loved her.

And none of us lived in pottery.

Looking back on my life, I wonder where I'd be today had I made different decisions. My first job after college took me to Lincoln, Nebraska. At the time, I had a job offer to work for ESPN (yes, Pauly isn't the first to get the call from the Worldwide Leader!). It was a chance to get on the path to my dream job.

I turned it down.

For a time, I wondered if I had made the wrong decision. I put all I had on the line and moved halfway across the country to work an overnight shift in a town in which I knew absolutely no one. It was hard. But I got lucky. Perhaps I pulled a four-outer on the river. I was quickly promoted and got a nice raise.

When it was time to move on, I had two very tempting offers. One was in the Pacific Northwest, Spokane to be exact. The other was in a small South Carolina town that I didn't even know existed. The Spokane job offer was for more money, a better shift and a more prestigious position.

I turned it down.

I never looked back to wonder if I made the wrong decision. I landed in G-Vegas and made the best friends I've ever had. And I got lucky. Perhaps I drew out again. After less than two weeks on the job, I was promoted. I worked side-by-side with Mrs. Otis for three years. I never wanted to leave.

But I had to. And out of the blue, I got a call to move to Knox-Vegas. It was a huge opportunity for me. Lots more money and a chance to take a big step professionaly. I had to take it.

It wasn't all I had dreamed of, but I was still close enough to get back to G-Vegas regularly. And then I got lucky. This was more like hitting the one-outer for the straight flush to beat four of a kind. A station down in little Lafayette, Louisiana needed a news director and they wanted me.

I couldn't turn it down.

That was more than three years ago. For the first two and a half years, I focused on my job. I focused on my job to the exclusion of anything else. And I wasn't happy. Let me amend that... I wasn't depressed, but I wasn't exactly walking on air.

Then I got lucky. This was more like holding a losing hand but having your opponent accidentally muck. That's the kind of luck I'm talking about here. It's like hitting the bad beat jackpot.

With some encouragement from BG, I dove into the dating world. The first woman I met was Lady Luck. To say I was nervous would be an understatement. She was gorgeous and funny. She laughed at my jokes and loved baseball and movies.

I fell in love. And I never looked back.

Last night, I put all my chips in the middle. And I won.

Lady Luck will soon become Mrs. Luckbox. And I couldn't be happier.

I played my last hand of online poker more than a month ago. In fact, I had cashed out shortly before my trip to Tunica. It ended up being a great time to get out because none of my money was stuck in NeTELLER.

Left with balances of mostly zero and a law that scared almost all online banks out of the market, there wasn't an easy way to get back in. But that's not why I'm not playing.

It wasn't so long ago that I had taken a rather extended break from online poker. You see, I had become a Jedi. I was using the force to kill rancors. I had built my first lightsaber. Bounty Hunters were trying to take me out. Yes, I was lost in the world of Star Wars Galaxies Online. It's this kind of information that scares Lady Luck.

That addiction didn't last. It fell to the wayside like past obsessions like baseball cards and ESPN fantasy sports. It's not that I don't still own those baseball cards or still play some fantasy sports, it's that they are no longer obsessions.

I only have one obsession now. She happens to be the most beautiful women I've ever known. Each week is just spent waiting for the weekend when I'll be able to spend time with her. This is the healthiest addiction of all.

I haven't said goodbye to poker... just online poker. I miss the days of taking all of wil's chips in the WWdN or of sucking out on Waffles in the Mookie. I miss trading 5% with Speaker and Change100 in the FTP guarantees or the $5 last longers with Jo. I miss all that. But the beauty of our community is that I'm not leaving all that behind.

The draw of the real felt is something you'll never drag me away from. In fact, Lady Luck encourages my play. And, hopefully, in a couple months, I'll be sitting across from you. You may not be seeing the Luckbox online, but that won't keep me from sucking out on you in Vegas!

The Pentagon Hammer by Otis
The HAMMER Spreads by Luckbox

Finally, this tidbit from G-Rob from a post in Dec. 2005:

I was playing over at Frank the Tank's last Wednesday, it was a $60 tourney where I played like crap, when someone dropped a huge hammer bluff. Weird thing about it was: a) I'd never seen this guy before and b) he called his hand "the hammer."

One of the players at the table, an older guy sitting to my right, asked him, "why do people call that hand 'the hammer'?" A third player, at the end of the table, another guy I'd never seen before, chimed in, "That's what it's always been called... like Big Slick... it's what all the pros call it."

I was stunned.

BadBlood, who was also at my table, chimed in with this nugget of truth, "Actually, it was invented by a friend of ours, a writer named "Grubby"."

The entire table laughed at what they obviously thought was a joke. BadBlood didn't bother to insist.

Who's got some advice?

I figure breaking out the deck of cards during foreplay is a bad idea.

The good news is that she's not a complete novice. She's played cards, she enjoys games... has even played a little poker here or there in her past.

It's the whole Texas Hold 'Em thing she's worried about. She says she tried it once and couldn't quite grasp it. I explained it was probably the easiest of the poker games to learn.

The bad news is that she'd be learning from me. Frankly, I'm not sure there's a real sound way of teaching my way of playing poker. In one of my favorite all-time posts (The Legend of the Luckbox), I laid out just a few rules of sucking out. But, really, is that a skill that can be taught?

Can Michael Jordan teach you to fly?

You see where my dilemma lies, right? I suppose it makes sense to just start with a little ABC poker. But you only learn by doing. Maybe I'll buy her into the Bad Blood New Years Invitational. Frankly, watching her lay a bad beat on GRob would make my 2007.

**********

I've been a little distracted recently, for a lot of reasons.

Some of you may have noticed my other blog has been "Under Construction." I'd like to elaborate, but perhaps that's the reason it's on hiatus in the first place. Unfortunately, I have an honest-to-goodness job and sometimes it gets in the way of life.

That's the bad. But I'm The Luckbox, remember. There's always got to be good. And this is real good.

**********

It's the first time I remembered "The Big Game." Usually, I'd log on and it'd be half over. Tonight, I ponied up the $75 to play (that's right, no little token for me!). 16 other players joined. And they all finished higher than me.

Deep stack events would generally invite slower play. That certainly wasn't the case at our table. I dumped nearly half my stack on hands I really didn't need to play. When my pocket 9s found an 8-high flop, I raised Derek all in. He gladly called with his set of deuces. I didn't even have the heart to ask the dealer for one of my two outs.

I am Gigli.

**********

Something pretty good happened a few weeks ago. I really need to give credit to a little encouragement from BG. Next time we're in the same place, I owe you a drink.

**********

Four fantasy football teams and four teams in line for the playoffs. One of them is suddenly in pretty big trouble. And the other may need a miracle.

More than that, my beloved Eagles are done.

Donovan McNabb tore is ACL today. His recovery time is somewhere between 8 to 12 months. That leaves one fantasy team to Michael Vick, another to Charlie Frye and my Eagles to either Jeff Garcia or A.J. Feely.

**********

"Maybe you should pick a new favorite team," she told me, completely oblivious to the years of toil and torment I've endured since becoming an Eagles fan.

"I can't," I said, laughing, although down 17-6 to the Titans with McNabb sidelined, I really wanted to cry.

"Why not? They're not very good."

We called today our 9th date. Unfortunately, we only get to see each other on weekends, so the last four weekends we've decided are two "dates" a piece. The last few Sundays, I've tried to teach her a little about football. Being from the Houston area, she decided she should be rooting for the Texans. I tried to explain her to the folly of that decision, but I'm an Eagles fan, remember?

**********

Last week, G-Rob let us all in on a little secret. His third child is on the way. I'm kinda rooting for a boy. I'd like to see how he handles a little G-Rob running around.

A few days later, Otis dropped the kind of post that makes me want to stop writing.

Both of them talked about friends and friendship. The friends I made in G-Vegas are the best I've ever had. It never hurts to remind myself of that. And the friends I've made in our humble little "community" have helped change my life in some of the best ways.

**********

My life at the poker table is running pretty damn cold right now. My Eagles have taken a turn for the worse dragging my fantasy football future with them. And my job... well...

But life is great right now. As good as I can remember it being in a long time. Thanks for asking.

The Pros Speak in New Orleans

"Are you guys all wise guys?? Don't be a wise guy. Not with me. I don't deserve it."

--John Bonetti, at my table in the WSOP Circuit. After the target of his ire wished him luck, Bonetti responded with, "Good luck to you, I don't need it." Apparently, he could have used some since he didn't cash.

"If no one ever got a hand in a tournament, I'd win every one."

--Mike "The Mouth" Matusow at the $10/$25 NL table next to mine, doing his best Phil Helmuth impersonation.

***silence***

--Phil Ivey after Gavin Smith busted him in the $10K WSOP Circuit Event. Phil held AK on a K-high flop but Gavin held KK.

There Were Highs

I think by now most people heard about the streak last year. I had a pretty good run of it the last few months of 2005 leading up to the WPBT. January made me believe that perhaps the streak would continue. I chopped in a big live tourney at the Coushatta and scored some nice online cashes. When I got back from the WSOP Circuit Event in Tunica, my bankroll had never been higher.

Then February happened.

The Pacific 50K

There was a $9000 overlay today in Pacific's big tourney. On the very first hand, I more than doubled up when I turned a flush. From there I found ideal times to chip up and got myself into the top ten with less than half the field remaining.

70 places paid and I was no lower 30 for most of the tournament. I was feeling really good about my play.

Then a combination of card-dead-itis and an unwillingness to use my big stack during the critical third hour found me near the bubble. I barely scratched my way into the bottom rung before completely misplaying pocket 8s (that would be a preflop limp and a post Q97-flop push into the BB's Q7). It was a disappointing result.

February is a Cold, Cold Month

I guess I'm lying a little. The temperature here probably never dropped below 50 during the day and barely cracked freezing a few times at night.

Perhaps just the cards were cold. Of course, it's hard to blame the cards when you're barely playing.

February wasn't the best month for me. If you don't know, I work in television news. In fact, someone was crazy enough to put me in charge of a newsroom. Four months out of the year, my performance is measured by what a few hundred people each week write down in a diary. They are ratings months, and February is one of them.

I think my bosses have expected more out of me and this was a tough month. My contract was going to come up soon and I could do nothing but hope I got an offer. I wasn't ready to go and I didn't feel like going through a job search. When you're never in one place more than 3 years, it grinds on you. If I fulfill my contract here, it'll be a record 4 years in one place.

Not only were ratings weighing on me, but I was going through an extremely delicate negotiation with a top news talent in the market. The president of the company sent an email telling me to get it done.

Needless to say, my mind wasn't on poker. I manged to lose 2/3rds of my live bankroll in two brutal sessions at the Coushatta and I played very little online and dropped another couple hundred bucks there.

More than anything, I didn't want to play.

The Poker Stars $1 Million

There was an $80,000 overlay in the Stars Million today. I decided to buy-in directly to try and take advantage of that. Things started slowly, but I doubled through with QQ vs. AK after I flopped a set and rivered a boat when the second K gave him trips.

I was feeling pretty good about my game here, too.

Then I fell into the same funk I was in over at Pacific. Maybe I tighten up too much in these levels. Whatever the case, I found myself quickly moving backwards.

Then I violated one of my own rules. Never go bust on a hand in which you check from the big blind. Okay, so maybe it's not a hard and fast rule to follow, but it's as close as it gets in my "It Depends" world.

I'm holding Q7 and the SB just completes. The flop comes down Q93. He bets out, I raise, he calls. I guess I could have figured he had something at this point. The turn was an A. He made a nice sized bet, but I didn't believe he had an Ace, I'm sure he would have raised preflop. However, once I eliminted the Ace in my mind, I decided not to think about what other hand he would make this move with. I push, he calls, and shows Q3. Ugh.

The Barren March

When March rolled around, I had my top talent's name on a contract and the bosses were happy. I then got my name on a contract that keeps me in Lafayette for a couple more years. Then the ratings from February came in and they were a mixed bag, at best.

The work pressures have been greater than they were when I got here. I thought it would have been the other way around. And the pressures make me come home from work and not want to face any pressures at the virtual poker table.

Apart from my play on Stars, I played in a total of four online events in March. It's the least I played in a month in a long, long time. I hit the live tables again, this time in Vegas (bookended around a brief trip to the Playboy Mansion, if you hadn't heard). I managed to lose the rest of my modest live bankroll. I just didn't play well, and, frankly, my head wasn't on the cards.

April is only half over and the bankroll's not looking good this month. I've been playing more, but probably not with the right mindset. I'm jumping in events I shouldn't and playing bad tournament poker.

It's Time for a Change

I've consolidated my bankrolls down to three sites: PokerStars, Full Tilt Poker and Pacific. For some reason, I've played in just two events at Pacific since February. Part of my plan includes getting back into those soft tourneys more regularly. I also plan on playing more token satellites at FTP and using those to enter guarantees. Finally, I'll likely be playing more SNG's at Stars than anything else. I've had success there and I enjoy them.

I want to start liking poker again. But, frankly, I have to play well to like it. And I'm not gonna play well if I'm not playing.

Let's see if I can turn it around the rest of this month.

Two For the Money

It's a terrible movie. It's the kind of movie that I wouldn't have minded if all the main characters died in some kind of horrible accident. And when I don't care about the characters there damn well better be some sex or action to keep me interested. This had neither. What it had, however, is an Al Pacino monologue that made me think about what I'm doing:

We look like everyone else but we're defective because when most people make a bet they want to win, while we, the degenerate gamblers of the world, we're subconsciously playing to lose. All humans like going to the edge of the abyss, but what makes us different is we go all the way and hurl ourselves off into the void! And we like doing it so much we do it time after time after time! Me? I always felt most alive when they were raking away the chips, and every one here knows what I'm talking about. People like us, even when we win, it's just a matter of time before we give it all back. But when we lose there's a moment when you're standing there and you've just recreated the worst possible nightmare this side of malignant cancer for the 20th goddamn time and you suddenly realize -- hey, I'm still here, I'm still breathing, I'm still alive!

Is he talking about you? Because I can tell you this, on some days, he's definitely talking about me.

Compulsively Compulsive

My Mom worries I'm becoming a compulsive gambler. I told her it's not gambling when you win, but I'm not sure she appreciates that joke anymore. I also say that the first step of overcoming a gambling addiction is to admit you have a problem. Well, I've been at step one for 4 years.

Okay, it's not that bad. I've taken the 20 question quiz online and I'm still in the clear. The bottom line is that I (and many of my poker-playing friends) have an addictive personality. I become attached to things pretty easily.

For more than a year, I played the online game Star Wars Galaxies. I played so long that my character became a Jedi. That's not easy to do. It means that I managed to waste hours and hours and hours of my life. I would play late into the night and fail to get enough sleep. I would come home from work and play at lunch.

I spent money playing this game. I bought it and paid a monthly fee. I never made a dime in return. At least poker has given me a return on my investment. Of course, maybe I should put my jedi on EBay. Anyone interested?

The two hurricanes that hit Louisiana helped wean me off SWG, but that's not really what did it. I actually become addicted to The Blonde. We chatted online almost every night. I was really looking forward to seeing her in Vegas, but it didn't work out. I actually got back into poker around that time, and winning a few thousand dollars from a few tourney cashes helped.

Fixing Me

Feburary was a bad poker month for me. I'm on my second short poker break since the end of January. My head just hasn't been in the game. I've been "that guy" Al Pacino was talking about. I take the majority of my roll and try to blow it as quickly as possible.

I made $2300 playing poker in January. I lost $2100 in February. I'm down $380 in live play and up about $800 (including March) in online play so far this year. This is the first time I've closely tracked my poker playing. It helps. Looking at the numbers makes a difference for me.

February was a tough month for me at work. It was a ratings month, it ended with extensive Mardi Gras coverage, and I was involved in an intense negotiation to bring a high profile anchor back to the station. It all turned out pretty well, but I wasn't in a good place to play poker.

I was sloppy. I played poorly. I let my emotions play me. And I wanted to lose. It's the only way I can explain the kind of plays that cost me money. And then I would push even harder, knowing I would lose it in the end.

I can't do that anymore.

The Break

I'm not going on a break. I'm going to play when I feel like it. I played a little last night and did well in a couple SNG's. I'm probably going to avoid live poker for awhile unless I really get the urge.

In the meantime, I'll fill in the gaps with the ponies. I haven't learned yet how to overcome my addictive personality. Like SWG, I'm getting hocked on horses. I'll try to be as smart about it, but I'm sure I'll lose some money. It will all come out of my poker roll, though, so I hope my Mom doesn't worry too much.

Hmmmm... maybe I should just find a girlfriend instead. Now that would make my Mom happy!

Although, I wonder if it's rude to ask for autographs in the john.

From the comments over at Up For Anything, Mom (that's Jen) tells us:

First, thanks everyone for the thoughts and prayers. They seem to be doing the job. JP was taken off of the respirator this afternoon, days earlier than they originally thought it would happen. Steve and I were there for it, and it was a question whether the nurse or our feisty little boy was going to be the one to pull the tube out!

He's still on supplemental oxygen and still has a serious lung infection (he passed his first bowel movement, called meconium, in utero and aspirated it before he was born), but the docs are as close to 100% certain as they're comfortable being that he's going to be just fine.

Steve and I are both grateful for the quick work and professionalism of the staff here at Portsmouth Naval Hospital--they saved JP's life.

Those other tense moments I mentioned were an issue with a collapsed lung earlier today. There were some issues with the tubes and machines used to keep JP breathing, but it sounds like all that will heal in due time as well. Thanks you all of you for your kind words.

First of all, there's gonna be no fight over who's in charge. That's me. I'm power hungry, it's in my nature. I'm drawn to positions of power and I just act like I'm in charge until everyone else starts to believe it. There will be no power struggle here...

Sean's my vice-president. He's an Eagles fan, so I know he's smart. He's also organized and I sense his type-A personality will work well with mine.

G-Rob and Otis are in charge of entertainment. If you think there's nothing to do on a desert island, think again. G-Rob and Otis have invented ways to entertain themselves with much less. Ask them about the Drunk Olympics some time (or just come to Bradoween!!!!).

That other group was dumb enough to travel with just guys. That will never work. With Maudie and April on our side of the island, we've got a clear advantage.

The Poker Geek's first task was to figure out how to develop an alcoholic beverage with whatever is at our disposal. If you can't tell, the Poker Geek is smart. He'll come up with something.

Finally, I brought wil wheaton. That automatically puts us ahead of the other side of the island in the coolness factor. Plus, we're much more likely to be rescued because the world will want to know what happened to wil!

After while, we'll stumble upon the other group near death, and considering who among them would taste good. That's when we'd rescue them. We are nice people after all, right?

I've known Joe longer than anyone, which is kind of easy to figure out since we spent 9 months in the womb together. And since the day we were born, he's been on an eternal quest for the perfect sidekick.

I obviously didn't fit the bill, but for years, I was all he had. There was the time he convinced me to help him hook up the vacuum hose to the faucet so we could play fireman. I guess it's my parent's fault for taking us to the fire station. Then there was the time we managed to cover our bathroom entirely in that green Comet cleanser powder. My mother's clue that we were up to no good was the green cloud through the doorway. Needless to say, I got in trouble an awful lot as Joe's sidekick.

When high school rolled around, Joe finally found an adequate replacement. Nate took my spot and the two of them became the closest thing our high school had to Laurel and Hardy. Their widely acclaimed "Nate and Joe show" was replete with some of the worst jokes you've ever heard... maybe Joe will recount them for you if you ask.

When it came time for college, Joe was on another search. That's where Mike came into the picture. It takes a unique personality to handle and appreciate Joe's sense of humor. Mike not only appreciated it, but he complimented it well. Their summer of Gettysburg trolly shows sealed their friendship. They were only almost arrested once.

Then Joe wound up in Chicago, and I was a little worried about him. Then he started talking about this girl. She was beautiful. She was fun. She laughed at his jokes. And most of all, she actively participated in his bizarre sense of humor. Perhaps they'd go into a convienence store and pretend that Meghan had a intense fear of sugar... so when they reached the sugar aisle, Joe could apologize to the rest of the shoppers.

It didn't take long for me to realize that Meghan was much, much more than a sidekick. Meghan was the love of his life. When they weren't together, he talked about her. When they were together, it was hard to get his attention. You could see it in their eyes, you could hear it in their words.

It was only a matter of time until this day came. I love my brother, and wanted to make sure I could proudly stand up for him on this day. Thankfully he fell in love with an amazing woman and I can stand here today and say, "Congratulations, may your marriage be a long and happy one. I'm sure it will be."

All the money in the above hand went in pre-flop! I love the chat, "lol"

Thirdly, I did some free-rolling at Pacific last night. The site sucks, I remember why I don't play there. But I logged in to see what I had, and found they added $10 to my account. So I played in a $10+1 SNG and won $50. Then I played in a 2-table $30+3 SNG and won $120. Then I cashed out my $138 so I can put it into a site I enjoy. Pacific will probably drop another 10 bucks in my account in a few months.